Love with your heart, but believe with your mind and keep your eyes open love was never intended to be blind and foolish. Let us enter the most important 9 questions you will need to ask before you walk down the aisle.
1. If both partners have different views of what this means the marriage will never be managed effectively.
2. What does the union look like to you and your fiancé? You’re deep in love and have a picture in mind of what the marriage will look like 5, 10 and 25 and years down the road. Your fiancé also has expectation of what the marriage will look like and how it will function. These expectations may be quite different so get them apparent early on.
3. You need to always have this beautiful story to reflect on and help refocus your feelings.
4. What’s your purpose in the marriage? Getting married is more about what you bring to the relationship than what you can get from it. There is a very particular set of reasons that make you the best person for your spouse. You need to understand how being you and fulfilling your potential will add enormous value to your spouse.
5. What’s the purpose of your spouse for a partner? No matter how well together you think you are, your spouse also has value to add that will make you a better person.
6. Who are you as a special person? You need to take time to figure out who you are before trying to become one with somebody else.
7. Who’s your fiancé as a different unique person? Apart from enjoying who you are as a unique person you need to appreciate the uniqueness of your fiancé also.
8. What problems have you already noticed? Love isn’t blind; love sees the best and minimises the worst. Love lets you know that the issues did not stop you from falling in love. You still must acknowledge the issues and bring them into the light.
9. What are the expectations you have for your life? Frustration comes when expectations are not met. In marriage you are likely to blame your partner when these are not met.
Taking the time to answer these 9 simple questions can save you from the pitfalls that have wrecked many couples. Reduce the risk of divorce by spending more time on questions like these and less on questions about the colour of bridesmaid dresses, menus and blossoms.
After realizing that the Laboratory and Medicine is not what I wanted to do with my life I began to focus far more on my gifts and passions. These now include business, design/art and writing. Now I can say I really like everything I do and have no more Monday blues or Friday highs. Live Free Die Empty.